It is well with my soul

In November, we got all gussied up and headed over to an old family farm in Lexington so that Lucas could snap some photos of the four of us. What a super special treat, I’m telling you! We all had so much fun with Lucas. Anna Cate will now tell you that her two favorite things are 1) weddings and 2) photo shoots. I think she would die if she new Mr. Lucas got to do both...at the same time...for a living! We have decided we have to build family pictures into our budget so we can do this every so often. (And if you are looking for somebody super talented and fun to work with, give Lucas a call. seriously, hands down, the best of the best.) And maybe this goes without saying, but all of the pics in this post are ones that he took (and two up there in the header too).

He has no idea what a blessing he was to our family and how much I treasure these photos of the four of us right here, right now, in this sweet season of life that we are in. 2011 was definitely a year I will always look back on with bittersweet memories; lots of laughter, many tears, growing closer as a family and learning to lean into the Lord with each step that I take.

Last week I was flipping through old pages in my journal. I hadn’t read back through things I had written earlier in the year, and I was humbled at just how specifically God had answered almost every prayer I had written on those pages. It certainly didn’t feel like He was answering prayers as we were living out our days in 2011, but looking back I can see His providence in all of it.

My heart has amnesia and I forget the lyrics to the songs that He has already taught me, ones that I thought I knew by heart. I question and I flail and I loose heart. I doubt His goodness and His grace when things don't feel good and circumstances don't work out according to my selfish desires.

Last January, while on our church's women's retreat in the cold, snowy mountains of Hendersonville, I heard one of the ladies speaking about how she claims a Bible verse for each day. So very naively, I decided I'd claim a verse for the year. I landed on Psalm 46:10

Be still, and know that I am God;

I will be exalted among the nations,

I will be exalted in the earth.

I think the "Be Still" part sounded great to me and I just disregarded the rest. Honestly, I do. Being still sounded like a great invitation to rest, a welcomed permission to slooooow down. Goodness gracious I had no idea what I was asking. To claim a verse and invite the Lord to show me what it meant.

So I returned home and went back to living life as I had always known it to be. God was part of my day, a quick "hello" in my quiet time or in brief worship as I sang along with the radio, but not part of my whole day. I did not need Him to carry me, to cover me with His grace because my heart felt raw and exposed.

But then He showed up to make good on our deal. He would teach my heart what it meant to know what Psalm 46:10 means. To live it out, in the flesh, to fight and claw my way into understanding what being still and knowing really means.

In the course of the next few months, I came to dread the text from Will that read

Call me asap.

I never knew when the next ball was going to drop:

"Can you talk?

The doctor just called.

It is melanoma.

I won't know how invasive until he sees the pathology report."

Be still and know.

"I'm so sorry sweetie, but Dandy just passed away."

Be still and know.

"My job circumstances have changed and I think now is the time to go off on my own and start my own business."

Be still and know

"It's Caws. She's gone.

It happened sometime early this morning while she was asleep."

Be still and know

As we packed our Christmas decorations up last year, I was so sure that we would be celebrating this Christmas as a family of five. And month after disappointing month, realizing that our desires were not part of God's plan for us right now.

Be still and know

It has been painful. All of it. Some days I feel forgotten and unloved. I feel like throwing my hands in the air and waving like a crazy woman, "Here, Lord, down here. Do you see me? Do you even realize what all we are going through right now? Why, why, and again WHY?"

The pain has made my heart tender, and though not at all what I would pick for myself if given the choice, it has been a beautiful mess because I have grown in an intimacy with Him that I have never known before. I walk around with a throbbing heart that can only find relief in His presence. In being still before Him.

A little verse that I thought would unlock permission for me to relax and rest has taught me so much about my own selfishness. About my own sense of entitlement; how ugly it is and how much that I exercise it on a daily basis. About patience and that waiting on the Lord produces a patience which leads to practicing contentment. And what a rich abundance contentment can be for those who truly find it and can find rest in Him and what He gives.

About living with an open palm instead of a closed fist. In learning to accept the good and what appears to be bad (the things we don't understand) as His love for us.

Be still, and know that I am God;

I will be exalted among the nations,

I will be exalted in the earth.

I had just been focusing on the first sentence, but silly me, there are two more. The greater part of the verse was the part that I chose to overlook at first. The when we are still before Him, we can not help but worship Him, exalting Him among the nations and in the earth.

I can no longer worship on Sunday mornings without tears. His grace is real and it is tender. And as December came to a close and I realized it was time to pick a new verse, you can understand my hesitancy at picking anything at all. In fact, I told Him that I wasn't, and if there was something He wanted me to learn in 2012, He was going to have to make it loud and clear as to what verse it would be.

And wouldn't you know, He did. And I baulked, stubborn and unrelenting. But He persisted. Over and over again He would put this verse in front of me until I could no longer argue my point. So now, in fear and trembling, I begin this new year, much like a timid doe stepping out of the forest, just waiting for the shot to go off:

But now, this is what the Lord says

he who created you, O Jacob,

he who formed you, O Isreal: "fear not, for I have redeemed you;

I have summoned you by name; you are mine."

Isaiah 43:1

I know, I know, I can only imagine what 2012 is going to be like.

Tomorrow is a Big Day

And I'm not sure who is more excited, she or I! She has already been to three ballets in the total of her three little years here with us. Most everyday, she wears her favorite leotard, tutu and most always requests to wear her hair in a bun. Her favorite Pandora channel is "Classical Ballet. " Her little sister and I are privileged to attend at least three shows a day, but are always offered an intermission in case we need to go to the bathroom. ;)

This morning, while she was at preschool, Caroline and I went and picked out her first real leotard for her first ballet class tomorrow. We wrapped it up and are anxiously waiting for her to open it tonight after dinner. I am a little nervous, but she is a lot excited so hopefully things will go well tomorrow!

:)

More pictures to follow...

Master Bath

Master Bath by OurHappyLittleNest on Polyvore.com

Vintage Nursery

Vintage Nursery by OurHappyLittleNest on Polyvore.com

We've moved!

Yes, it's true...we've set up a new blog and will no longer be posting here. It is really hard to keep up with two babies and two blogs, so I'll be combining our family blog and my craft blog into one! We also have privacy concerns. I checked our stats the other day and was shocked at how many hits we are getting. I am going to continue blogging, but won't use our last name.

If you've linked our blog to your blog, would you mind changing the new url address? I know that is a hassle, but we'd really appreciate it! :)

Our new address is www.ourhappylittlenest.blogspot.com. (I know it is somewhat cheesy, but EVERYTHING I could think of has already been registered with blogspot!! I've been brainstorming for several weeks and this is all I could come up with that isn't already in use.)

Hope we'll see you soon at the new website!

Will and Mary Catherine

Wordless Wednesday

Because really, there are no words.

The Camping Trip that Wasn't

We thought it would be great fun to take the girls up to Table Rock to stay in one of those little humble state park cabins for the weekend. We called to make reservations and unfortunately, they were all booked up for several months...go figure.

Then Will suggested we try someplace closer to home and just stay in our tent. We pulled our camping gear down from the attic and set the tent up in the den. I was a little hesitant about all four of us sleeping in a 2-man tent, but, why not? What is the worst thing that could happen? We just might not get any sleep for a night.

We decided on Dreher Island and I called Friday morning to reserve a camp site. After four (yes 4!) dropped calls, I finally was able to speak to someone who could help us. But when she asked me for my credit card, I suddenly couldn't find my wallet. I was still in my nightgown, curlers in my hair, frantically running around the house and out to my car while holding a wailing Caroline looking for my wallet. (I find myself continuously looking for the hidden camera that must be following me around now that I have two children. I mean really, we'd make a great reality show right now). I finally asked her if I could just call her back. As soon as I hung up the phone I realized THIS TRIP IS NOT MEANT TO BE.

I called Will to tell him what had happened and that I thought it was a sign that we weren't suppose to go. We both agreed that it would probably be best to have a test run in our backyard anyways because I had a feeling somebody might panic when the sun went down and she was expected to sleep in the tent.

All I can say is THANK GOODNESS I FOLLOWED MY INTUITION!

This is the story our very first family camping trip. ;)

All started out well! She kept telling us how she was camping and going to sleep in a tent!

Not quite sure what to think, but things are still looking optimistic...

We grilled up some steaks and enjoyed a picnic dinner outside.

After dinner, we thought we'd try sitting in the tent before we changed into our pj's and pulled out the sleeping bags.

We were good for about 3 minutes, but once it was totally dark outside, she began to get nervous. She kept looking out of the tent windows and started saying, "Daddy, I tait see me house, Daddy!"

This kept on for a couple of minutes more until it resulted in a full blown freak out!

Just look at that face! It looks like we had our very own Blair Witch Project right here in the back yard.

Now what kind of mother would continue to take pictures?? I know, I'm horrible! Bless her heart, it was so funny I almost wet my pants. Needless to say, this concluded our first attempt to camp out.

Brave, Daring, or Just Plain Nuts?

We shall soon find out!

We are packing up for a little family camping trip. Be back soon with some pictures and stories to share of our adventure.

Have a wonderful weekend!

Simple Pleasures

Anna Cate's favorite past time right now is pretending to be Cinderella while she cleans the floor. I kid you not, the child is perfectly happy with some paper towels and a spray bottle. This keeps her busy for as long as 45 minutes and Caroline is just as content to sit and watch Anna Cate, which gives me a chance to get supper on the table!

And please note the green ribbon she has tied around her waist. This is the "sash" that she insists on wearing while she cleans...just like Cinderella. ;)

Busy Bees

We have been busy little bees the past several weeks! It seems we've had an outing or a play date almost everyday recently.

Zoo Trip with Reece and Mason

Sharing a snack with Mason at the zoo. (I think this was the first of four snack breaks we took during the hour and a half that we were there.) ;)

Anna Cate, Reece, and Mason examining a salamander. And no, this was not a zoo exhibit, just a random salamander they found during our second snack break.

Picnic in the Park with Benson

These two were precious together. Benson introduced Anna Cate to the waterfall that is at the park and it is all she has talked about since. She keeps asking her daddy if he will take her to the "waterplall at the park."

Looking for rocks to throw in the creek.

Benson also shared one of his toy cars with Anna Cate and taught her how to race them down the slide. She had a blast being introduced to all of these boyish past times. Maybe one day Benson can come to our house and Anna Cate can show him how to bake some cookies in her little oven. ;)

Sweet Caroline

It is pure bliss when daddy comes home from work. The house immediately becomes filled with the sounds of squeals, giggles, and the sound of little feet (first running to the door to greet him, and then almost immediately running away before he can get her. )

Go tigers!

This was seriously the best picture from about 15 that I took last Thursday morning as we were rushing out of the door to story time at the library. The girls were wearing their matching Clemson dresses (thank you Miep!) because the Tigers had a game that night. :)

The Story of "Jomah" According to Anna Cate

Please just ignore me repeating everything she is saying. I did that to try and interperet because otherwise, you might not understand a word she is saying! :)

Sweet as Sugar

I'm afraid Will is going to come home one day to find

I've eaten her all up!

Here are some pics of the girls from this week for those who have been requesting more photos!

We usually have a dance party in the evenings after supper. Anna Cate loves to pull something out of her dress up box to wear while dancing and this particular night she also brought Caroline a tutu to wear so she could also join in the fun!

A Little R&R at the IOP

Will and I took the girls to the beach last weekend for our first official vacation with just the four of us. Will headed back to work on Sunday and I had planned to come back with him, but we were having so much fun that we decided to stay through the week.

Some of the Bunco girls came down with all of their kiddos on Monday. With 6 adults and 8 children (ages 8 weeks to 3 years), we had a house full! It was so much fun for Anna Cate to have some playmates on the beach and I really enjoyed some fun girl time!

Caroline with her buddy Sarah Kate chillin out by the pool.

Anna Cate is getting braver in the water. She started sticking her head in the water and jumping off of the side of the pool to us this week.

Anna Cate doesn't like the waves in the ocean, but their is a tidal pool on the beach that she loves playing in. The pool had tons of star fish and although she was a little timid of them at first, she finally found the courage to pick one up.

Then Will surprised us by coming back down on Thursday evening for another weekend at the beach.

Another attempt to get a decent family picture. It was too windy and Anna Cate wouldn't sit still long enough to get a good picture.

For those of you who have heard us call Caroline "Fluffy" (or as Anna Cate says, "Pluffy") this is a fantastic example of why. Any time we take her outside, the wind blow her hair straight up on her head and it stays that way until we wash it. Poor little thing!